The Try-hard is a more amorphous person. What I mean by this statement is that there is much less of a norm which I could describe versus the "Lad".
In general the definition of a Try-Hard is that he was a boy who did not have the kudos (through sports achievement or physical size etc.) to be a "lad". However he would very much desire to be a "lad" - ie to be seen as a success by the Goring boy-culture. As such he was someone highly orientated towards the "lads" and spent much time praising the lads or, in some way, following around a lad figure.
The Lads had high social postition. As I said in my previous post they had an attitude of disdain, if not direct dislike towards the "squares" - or rejects. However they would not normally talk to these latter. The Try-Hards, however, were closer to the "squares". For example, in a physical way. In my house Each house/ year had one long table on which the geoup of c 12 boys sat. This long table was roughly divided such that the lads sat at one end (the cool end), the rejects at the opposite end ( the un-cool end) and the try-hards in the middle, thus forming a simple hierarchy of importance / space (more on tables in teh refectory later).
In order to impress the Lads the try hard would often directly mock the "squares" or in some other way make their life unpleasant, where the lads did not have such direct contact with the squares. However this fitted in with the distant 'disdain' of the lads.
Description of the Try-Hard.
My desription of the Lads (see previous post) probably covers 75% of the Lads. Any description of the Try Hard must cover much less - perhaps 25%, due to the reasons given above. - That is - there is no positive definition of a try hard, it is more the negative definition of anyone who could not make lad status but "sucked-up", to speak pejoratively, to the Lads.
So here goes (as I say 25% should be the rule)
The Try Hard:
Wore a grumpy or sneering expression
Was not of large build, not very physically strong
Spoke very sarcastically
Spoke in a clever/cynical manner, with negative phraseology like "Don't you just hate the way..."
Might wear slightly rebel-ish clothes, like pointy shoes
Had long floppy hair at the front (short back and sides)
Was in the 3rds / 4ths rugby team (or lower)
Especially liked playing to a popular-class image (eg by making a big deal out of supporting a football team)
More to come...
Monday, 6 August 2007
Saturday, 4 August 2007
Boy hierarchies - the "Lads": sporty and slob
I cannot emphasise enough how, at Goring, it was the boy / pupil cuture that was dominant. That culture was formed of certain very powerful boy-led conventions. These were all important to life at Goring. They were much more important than the influence of the masters / authorities, more important than personal relationships, more important than background, more important than parents, brothers etc. Was this because the school was a boarding school? Perhaps.
Here I am going to talk about one aspect, perhaps one of the most important, of this boy led culture - the Lad hierarchy.
I will only generalise now. There was more complexity than I will write below. Hopefully this will come through in these memoirs generally. However the basic structures, as below, hold true.
There were three types of Boy, in terms of acceptance / success in boy culture terms at Goring: the "Lad", the "Try-Hard" and the "Square". Simply put, the "Lad" was someone seen as a success by the all-powerful boy-led cuture - the "square" was the opposite. Try-Hards - made up probably the majority of the population. They were boys who would like to have been one of the "lads" but did not (quite) make it. They often spent much time and energy seeking approval from the "lads".
There were, crudely speaking, two types of "Lad": the Slob and the Sporty lad. Sometimes they combined but not often. If anything the Sporty Lad was a slightly higher lad - in status.
The Sporty Lad was very good at one of two types of sport - Rugby or Cricket - with Rugby very much the most important of the two. In the sixth form he was either in the 1st XV Rugby or the 1st XI cricket. Let us quantify what this means for a moment: The above is c 30 boys vs nearly 300 pupils in the sixth form. That means that there was about one of these per year per house.
However it was not quite so clear cut as that. In practice some sporty lads would have been accepted as such whilst not always being in the top team (sometimes dropping into the second XV rugby, for example). Probably there were 1 or 2 top sporty lads in each house/year unit. I remember there being one in mine.
The 'Slob' lad was of a different kind. He tended to be a large boy, normally tall, sometimes large waisted as well - but always physically big. He tended to have long unkempt hair. He was almost always a smoker (from the start, aged 13) and thus often had the pungent smell of tobacco on his clothes. He had a violent presence, threatening. A main habit was that of "hoicking" up phlegm and spitting it out on the walkway so that the walkway often had patches of this substance dotted along it. He was a "rebel" type, much more likely to be in trouble with the authorities than the sporty lad. Due to his being (normally) older-looking than his age he was often the boy who went down to the local off-licence and managed to get hold of bottles of vodka etc. which he would drink himself or sell to less mature looking boys.
In my house year (as a representative sample of 12 boys?) there was one of these.
The 'slob' lad might be recognisable to many as featuring in most schools with adolescent boys. I remember one of the slob lads identifying strongly with the T-Birds gang image in 'Grease'. The ideas seen in the latter: cigarette smoking, grease-hair styling, leather jacket, cars, trying to seduce the women, being deliberatly cool, having a strong "cool" image etc. These things the Slob lad was more orientated to. A slob lad would like the idea of being leader of the gang but in practice 'gangs' did not exist. However there was probably more a culture of slob lads from different houses hanging around together than sporty lads doing the same.
In some ways the slob lad was more interested in being cool, for its own sake, and being a 'slob' was part of this. In contrast the sporty lad was admired for the physical prowess that he (naturally) possessed. This might explain some of the reason why the Sporty Lad had a slightly higher place in the Goring boy popularity culture. The auhtorities also placed high importance on sporting achievement.
There are some parallels between the two lad types in the american teen film, "The Breakfast Club" with Emilio Estevez playing the sporty lad and Judd Nelson playing the slob lad (the third boy is a 'square' / brainy 'geek'). There are differences however. Most notably the film blames the misery of these teenagers on their parents' daily treatment of them, pushing them to be how they are. Also the presence of girls makes a marked difference. Perhaps the greatest difference, however, is that of self-image. In the American film both of these types, whilst confident and outspken, show considerable self doubt during the film. And, if anything the sporty lad is more slef doubting than the slob lad. At Goring the "lad" was supremely self-confident and happy with his position, aboev all the sporty lad.
Both types of Lads had physical strength in common. Both lads had status and, on their own right, popularity. Because of the "cool" status that they both held they wre happy to recognise each other and talk together in common areas such as meals. However they did not "hang out together" much.
Sometimes a slob lad would make a leap upwards into the rank of "Sporty" lads. This was done by the slob lad applying his considerable brute strength to sports (instead of only to slobbing). At this point the Slob lad, for example, got into the 1st XV rugby. He then made an example of a combination of both types, as he would never fully give up his slob side. I do not remember sporty lad giving up sport and descending into the ranks of the slobs - but I suppose it must have happened.
In later years the slob type was more likely to get very drunk at the pub and get involved in fights etc. He tended to have especially foul language. He also tended to talk of women as purely objects designed for his genital gratification. He was an open user of pornography etc.
In contrast the sporty lad was not so outwardly a violent and unpleasant personage. However, in my 5 year experience I would not say that one was more kind than the other. The "lad" or "cool" status seemed often to be hand in hand with a disdaining attitude towards the "uncool".
I mentioned above that in practice gangs did not exist. A little more on this. I think the public school, and in particular, the house system meant that gangs could not really exist. One can't really form a "leader-type" gang from only 12 boys. It might be more realistic to form a "cool" gang of boys (say 8 strong) from a social grouping of say 100. Our year group was c 140 boys so this could have been possible. In practice the division into 12 houses, and the cultural and 'domestic' importance of the house structure meant this was impossible. In its place was the "lad" system. In general the house system failed in its key original aim - of making a family type environment due to the mix of ages / years being housed together. However in this respect, that of preventing the gang culture, it was effective.
I have attempted to describe the typical features of a 'lad'. The 'system' was that these boys were recognised by the rest of the boys as the ones who were most to be looked up to and admired. Other boys in the year did not insult them but sought to praise them and gain praise from them, or kept out of their way (the latter being the 'squares').
More on lads, try-hards and squares to come
Here I am going to talk about one aspect, perhaps one of the most important, of this boy led culture - the Lad hierarchy.
I will only generalise now. There was more complexity than I will write below. Hopefully this will come through in these memoirs generally. However the basic structures, as below, hold true.
There were three types of Boy, in terms of acceptance / success in boy culture terms at Goring: the "Lad", the "Try-Hard" and the "Square". Simply put, the "Lad" was someone seen as a success by the all-powerful boy-led cuture - the "square" was the opposite. Try-Hards - made up probably the majority of the population. They were boys who would like to have been one of the "lads" but did not (quite) make it. They often spent much time and energy seeking approval from the "lads".
There were, crudely speaking, two types of "Lad": the Slob and the Sporty lad. Sometimes they combined but not often. If anything the Sporty Lad was a slightly higher lad - in status.
The Sporty Lad was very good at one of two types of sport - Rugby or Cricket - with Rugby very much the most important of the two. In the sixth form he was either in the 1st XV Rugby or the 1st XI cricket. Let us quantify what this means for a moment: The above is c 30 boys vs nearly 300 pupils in the sixth form. That means that there was about one of these per year per house.
However it was not quite so clear cut as that. In practice some sporty lads would have been accepted as such whilst not always being in the top team (sometimes dropping into the second XV rugby, for example). Probably there were 1 or 2 top sporty lads in each house/year unit. I remember there being one in mine.
The 'Slob' lad was of a different kind. He tended to be a large boy, normally tall, sometimes large waisted as well - but always physically big. He tended to have long unkempt hair. He was almost always a smoker (from the start, aged 13) and thus often had the pungent smell of tobacco on his clothes. He had a violent presence, threatening. A main habit was that of "hoicking" up phlegm and spitting it out on the walkway so that the walkway often had patches of this substance dotted along it. He was a "rebel" type, much more likely to be in trouble with the authorities than the sporty lad. Due to his being (normally) older-looking than his age he was often the boy who went down to the local off-licence and managed to get hold of bottles of vodka etc. which he would drink himself or sell to less mature looking boys.
In my house year (as a representative sample of 12 boys?) there was one of these.
The 'slob' lad might be recognisable to many as featuring in most schools with adolescent boys. I remember one of the slob lads identifying strongly with the T-Birds gang image in 'Grease'. The ideas seen in the latter: cigarette smoking, grease-hair styling, leather jacket, cars, trying to seduce the women, being deliberatly cool, having a strong "cool" image etc. These things the Slob lad was more orientated to. A slob lad would like the idea of being leader of the gang but in practice 'gangs' did not exist. However there was probably more a culture of slob lads from different houses hanging around together than sporty lads doing the same.
In some ways the slob lad was more interested in being cool, for its own sake, and being a 'slob' was part of this. In contrast the sporty lad was admired for the physical prowess that he (naturally) possessed. This might explain some of the reason why the Sporty Lad had a slightly higher place in the Goring boy popularity culture. The auhtorities also placed high importance on sporting achievement.
There are some parallels between the two lad types in the american teen film, "The Breakfast Club" with Emilio Estevez playing the sporty lad and Judd Nelson playing the slob lad (the third boy is a 'square' / brainy 'geek'). There are differences however. Most notably the film blames the misery of these teenagers on their parents' daily treatment of them, pushing them to be how they are. Also the presence of girls makes a marked difference. Perhaps the greatest difference, however, is that of self-image. In the American film both of these types, whilst confident and outspken, show considerable self doubt during the film. And, if anything the sporty lad is more slef doubting than the slob lad. At Goring the "lad" was supremely self-confident and happy with his position, aboev all the sporty lad.
Both types of Lads had physical strength in common. Both lads had status and, on their own right, popularity. Because of the "cool" status that they both held they wre happy to recognise each other and talk together in common areas such as meals. However they did not "hang out together" much.
Sometimes a slob lad would make a leap upwards into the rank of "Sporty" lads. This was done by the slob lad applying his considerable brute strength to sports (instead of only to slobbing). At this point the Slob lad, for example, got into the 1st XV rugby. He then made an example of a combination of both types, as he would never fully give up his slob side. I do not remember sporty lad giving up sport and descending into the ranks of the slobs - but I suppose it must have happened.
In later years the slob type was more likely to get very drunk at the pub and get involved in fights etc. He tended to have especially foul language. He also tended to talk of women as purely objects designed for his genital gratification. He was an open user of pornography etc.
In contrast the sporty lad was not so outwardly a violent and unpleasant personage. However, in my 5 year experience I would not say that one was more kind than the other. The "lad" or "cool" status seemed often to be hand in hand with a disdaining attitude towards the "uncool".
I mentioned above that in practice gangs did not exist. A little more on this. I think the public school, and in particular, the house system meant that gangs could not really exist. One can't really form a "leader-type" gang from only 12 boys. It might be more realistic to form a "cool" gang of boys (say 8 strong) from a social grouping of say 100. Our year group was c 140 boys so this could have been possible. In practice the division into 12 houses, and the cultural and 'domestic' importance of the house structure meant this was impossible. In its place was the "lad" system. In general the house system failed in its key original aim - of making a family type environment due to the mix of ages / years being housed together. However in this respect, that of preventing the gang culture, it was effective.
I have attempted to describe the typical features of a 'lad'. The 'system' was that these boys were recognised by the rest of the boys as the ones who were most to be looked up to and admired. Other boys in the year did not insult them but sought to praise them and gain praise from them, or kept out of their way (the latter being the 'squares').
More on lads, try-hards and squares to come
Friday, 3 August 2007
First days at the house
Unfortunately I kept no diary to aid me now in a chronological reflection. So I can only recall particular (emotional) moments.
I remember that when I got to Goring, I was (for whatever reason!) acutely self-conscious. It was a moment (I was 13) when I was starting out on teenage insecurity. To give an example, I had never thought about having a "hairstyle" before coming to Goring. I simply let my hair fall into its natural shape, and neatened that shape out when necessary with a brush or comb. All of a sudden at Goring most boys seemed to have some form of strong policy (or hairstyle) with their hair. I remember frantically trying to give myself a parting for the first few years... (now I effectively wear my hair in the same way as I did as a child pre-Goring).
So, back to my first days. Amid this somewhat paralysing sense of self-consciousness and amid the fear of being in a new place, and amid the fear (or was it terror?) of the reputation of the place (gleaned from stories reported to me by old boys of my prep school who were at Goring already), how was I greeted?
Not with kindness.
I can remember no kindly friend, no kindly person in my year, no kindly older boy who might help me to adjust, tell me how best to manage my first days and weeks.
To my acute embarrassment I found myself within a day being mocked by boys of my own year for having large collars on my shirts. This was especially unfortunate: Goring had no uniform but it required the wearing of tie and jacket with adequately 'smart' shirt and trousers. My previous school had had a uniform and I had never thought about what clothes to wear up till going to Goring. I was very self-conscious before going of wearing the right (socially-acceptable) clothes. A friend who had gone the year before told me it was imperative that I wore striped shirts - that was the trend at Goring. So I asked my parents to buy me striped shirts. This they did but, unfortunately for their self-conscious son, ones with large collars. The "coolest" boy in my year called me "wings" on my first day. The nickname stuck for some time.
[I will discuss what I mean by "coolest" later in a section on boy 'gang' hierarchies.]
In general I remember when others talked to me feeling disdained and certainly very 'uncool', not one of the 'lads'. By others I mean boys from my year. At this stage in the first few days other years spoke to us sparingly and did not engage much directly. The bullying by older years had not begun yet. However I do remember that boys in the second year told me how new I was and made a big point of making me feel something lower through such deep lack of experience of the ropes.
I remember talking to one of my peers in my year in those first days at Supper one day. He was from one of the Goring Junior schools and was a "cool" boy (almost by default many such boys coming from the junior schools were established in the system and thus often "cool"). He asked a few questions about my likes and dislikes. They were along the lines of 'coll' areas - or areas of interest activity which were the vogue for the in-crowd at the time. I particular remember him asking me what was my favourite pop group. I did not have an answer as I had not listened to much pop music prior to coming to Goring and had certainly not taken much interest in 'the charts' / the latest fashions. My home was one where we had only been brought up with so-called "classical" music. I remember the boy at this point turning away from me in disdain. I was clearly not at all on his wavelength. But I desperatley wanted a friend.. I desperately wanted approval so these moments were unhappy for me.
I remember, as other boys talked to me, the sense of fear in my body, that they only wanted to mock me. This probably was not always the case and I am sad that I let myself be so caught up with fear and self-consciousness. The only excuse is that the hostile and Darwinian atmosphere bred fear.
I remember well that at the end of the first week a great 'boys' event took place. There was to be a film shown at the school cinema. It was a very popular american action film and there was large demand to see it. The Cinema was held in a special building with a projector. Hundreds gathered outside the building at the time when the doors were due to open (boys had to pay!). But there was only room for a hundred or so. I found myself in the middle of a heaving mass of (to me) huge boys. I remember being told, "you smell... you've got greasy hair..." From then on I desperately washed my hair every day (sometimes more) until I grew out of my ultra self-conscious stage (that took about 3 years... more on that topic to come). I remember feeling miserable in this large, violent, abusive throng. Conclusion: I was too small and junior to manage to get in anyway.
I remember that when I got to Goring, I was (for whatever reason!) acutely self-conscious. It was a moment (I was 13) when I was starting out on teenage insecurity. To give an example, I had never thought about having a "hairstyle" before coming to Goring. I simply let my hair fall into its natural shape, and neatened that shape out when necessary with a brush or comb. All of a sudden at Goring most boys seemed to have some form of strong policy (or hairstyle) with their hair. I remember frantically trying to give myself a parting for the first few years... (now I effectively wear my hair in the same way as I did as a child pre-Goring).
So, back to my first days. Amid this somewhat paralysing sense of self-consciousness and amid the fear of being in a new place, and amid the fear (or was it terror?) of the reputation of the place (gleaned from stories reported to me by old boys of my prep school who were at Goring already), how was I greeted?
Not with kindness.
I can remember no kindly friend, no kindly person in my year, no kindly older boy who might help me to adjust, tell me how best to manage my first days and weeks.
To my acute embarrassment I found myself within a day being mocked by boys of my own year for having large collars on my shirts. This was especially unfortunate: Goring had no uniform but it required the wearing of tie and jacket with adequately 'smart' shirt and trousers. My previous school had had a uniform and I had never thought about what clothes to wear up till going to Goring. I was very self-conscious before going of wearing the right (socially-acceptable) clothes. A friend who had gone the year before told me it was imperative that I wore striped shirts - that was the trend at Goring. So I asked my parents to buy me striped shirts. This they did but, unfortunately for their self-conscious son, ones with large collars. The "coolest" boy in my year called me "wings" on my first day. The nickname stuck for some time.
[I will discuss what I mean by "coolest" later in a section on boy 'gang' hierarchies.]
In general I remember when others talked to me feeling disdained and certainly very 'uncool', not one of the 'lads'. By others I mean boys from my year. At this stage in the first few days other years spoke to us sparingly and did not engage much directly. The bullying by older years had not begun yet. However I do remember that boys in the second year told me how new I was and made a big point of making me feel something lower through such deep lack of experience of the ropes.
I remember talking to one of my peers in my year in those first days at Supper one day. He was from one of the Goring Junior schools and was a "cool" boy (almost by default many such boys coming from the junior schools were established in the system and thus often "cool"). He asked a few questions about my likes and dislikes. They were along the lines of 'coll' areas - or areas of interest activity which were the vogue for the in-crowd at the time. I particular remember him asking me what was my favourite pop group. I did not have an answer as I had not listened to much pop music prior to coming to Goring and had certainly not taken much interest in 'the charts' / the latest fashions. My home was one where we had only been brought up with so-called "classical" music. I remember the boy at this point turning away from me in disdain. I was clearly not at all on his wavelength. But I desperatley wanted a friend.. I desperately wanted approval so these moments were unhappy for me.
I remember, as other boys talked to me, the sense of fear in my body, that they only wanted to mock me. This probably was not always the case and I am sad that I let myself be so caught up with fear and self-consciousness. The only excuse is that the hostile and Darwinian atmosphere bred fear.
I remember well that at the end of the first week a great 'boys' event took place. There was to be a film shown at the school cinema. It was a very popular american action film and there was large demand to see it. The Cinema was held in a special building with a projector. Hundreds gathered outside the building at the time when the doors were due to open (boys had to pay!). But there was only room for a hundred or so. I found myself in the middle of a heaving mass of (to me) huge boys. I remember being told, "you smell... you've got greasy hair..." From then on I desperately washed my hair every day (sometimes more) until I grew out of my ultra self-conscious stage (that took about 3 years... more on that topic to come). I remember feeling miserable in this large, violent, abusive throng. Conclusion: I was too small and junior to manage to get in anyway.
Thursday, 2 August 2007
Houses - the house system
Goring was divided into 12 houses.
The house system was very important. In practice most social activity occurred within the individual boy's house. The Dormitories, sixth form rooms and refectories were in one's house. The house also had a common room (where there was a TV which was on in the free time periods ), a chapel for prayers (next to the common room), sometimes a recreation area / hall (mine had a snooker table) and most houses had some sort of "garden" outside area where boys could play games, such as football and cricket.
The house was located in a separate building. What I mean by this is that it was totally separate as a space / collection of walls etc. from other houses or school buildings. There was normally limited access to the house (one main door and perhaps one back door) so each house was very much an island. My house was in fact part of one large building which contained two "houses". The building was divided in two and our house front door was therefore only 100 yards from that of the next door house But there was no access through between the houses. To go into that house I had to go through the front door and ask the house master for permission just like for other houses located atr a much further distance.
In order to go to another house, a boy had to go into the room of the housemaster of that other house and ask permission. This, in effect, presented a fairly strong motivation for not going to another house.
The main point which I want to emphasise is one which will be very important to these memoirs - and which I will discuss further in later posts. It is this point: The boys' internal culture was pre-eminent at Goring. It was not the masters who formed the way the school functioned, its atmosphere etc. It was the boys.
As such there were many underlying boy-driven cultures which were very powerful, which I will discuss further in subsequent chapters. One of these was the importance of the house, another was the importance of only having friends in one's own year group.
This meant that my house/ year group was the vital social group for me.
The house was divided into 5 years. The first 3 years lived in two dormitories of c 20 boys each, the final 2 years (the sixth form) were in bedrooms, some shared, some individual - on the "sixth form corridoors" . These were two corridoors on the other side of the building from the Dormitories.
Each year groups was c 12 boys strong - making a house of c 60 boys. The system of relationship between these year groups when I arrived was as follows.
Sixth formers were God-like figures. "Juniors" (especially first years) were never to speak to them unless spoken to first. Sixth formers were distant from the juniors but they generally did not do any bullying, simply kept aloof. Third years were the bullies. The third years inflicted their greater strenght over the second years and first years through physical and mental bullying of a fairly severe kind. The third years were also the dorm captains so they had official power conferred on them also. The second years bullied the first years but more lightly (the min bullying relationship was third years to first years) and more commonly in words than through physical violence. They emphasised as much as possible that the first years were "New" and "cocky" and had much to learn.
The situation, as might be deducted from the above, was strongly Darwinian / survivalist. Friendship with my own year group in my house was very important for me. For friendship I had therefore only 11 other boys to look for. That these should be boys with whom I had natural sympathy and attraction was highly desirable. Unfortunately this was not the case for my year group (in my house). I was to suffer much for this.
Sadly the house sytem meant that I had very limited access to the other 130 or so pupils in my year with whom I might have made and maintained up-building friendships. It was agonising to me how, in pratice, it seemed impossible to keep up a friendship with friends in other houses. Some friends I had known from before Goring days and I had had with such friends warm and upbuilding friendship experience. The house system was a very powerful culture and claimed the pupil too strongly.
More on the house system to come...
The house system was very important. In practice most social activity occurred within the individual boy's house. The Dormitories, sixth form rooms and refectories were in one's house. The house also had a common room (where there was a TV which was on in the free time periods ), a chapel for prayers (next to the common room), sometimes a recreation area / hall (mine had a snooker table) and most houses had some sort of "garden" outside area where boys could play games, such as football and cricket.
The house was located in a separate building. What I mean by this is that it was totally separate as a space / collection of walls etc. from other houses or school buildings. There was normally limited access to the house (one main door and perhaps one back door) so each house was very much an island. My house was in fact part of one large building which contained two "houses". The building was divided in two and our house front door was therefore only 100 yards from that of the next door house But there was no access through between the houses. To go into that house I had to go through the front door and ask the house master for permission just like for other houses located atr a much further distance.
In order to go to another house, a boy had to go into the room of the housemaster of that other house and ask permission. This, in effect, presented a fairly strong motivation for not going to another house.
The main point which I want to emphasise is one which will be very important to these memoirs - and which I will discuss further in later posts. It is this point: The boys' internal culture was pre-eminent at Goring. It was not the masters who formed the way the school functioned, its atmosphere etc. It was the boys.
As such there were many underlying boy-driven cultures which were very powerful, which I will discuss further in subsequent chapters. One of these was the importance of the house, another was the importance of only having friends in one's own year group.
This meant that my house/ year group was the vital social group for me.
The house was divided into 5 years. The first 3 years lived in two dormitories of c 20 boys each, the final 2 years (the sixth form) were in bedrooms, some shared, some individual - on the "sixth form corridoors" . These were two corridoors on the other side of the building from the Dormitories.
Each year groups was c 12 boys strong - making a house of c 60 boys. The system of relationship between these year groups when I arrived was as follows.
Sixth formers were God-like figures. "Juniors" (especially first years) were never to speak to them unless spoken to first. Sixth formers were distant from the juniors but they generally did not do any bullying, simply kept aloof. Third years were the bullies. The third years inflicted their greater strenght over the second years and first years through physical and mental bullying of a fairly severe kind. The third years were also the dorm captains so they had official power conferred on them also. The second years bullied the first years but more lightly (the min bullying relationship was third years to first years) and more commonly in words than through physical violence. They emphasised as much as possible that the first years were "New" and "cocky" and had much to learn.
The situation, as might be deducted from the above, was strongly Darwinian / survivalist. Friendship with my own year group in my house was very important for me. For friendship I had therefore only 11 other boys to look for. That these should be boys with whom I had natural sympathy and attraction was highly desirable. Unfortunately this was not the case for my year group (in my house). I was to suffer much for this.
Sadly the house sytem meant that I had very limited access to the other 130 or so pupils in my year with whom I might have made and maintained up-building friendships. It was agonising to me how, in pratice, it seemed impossible to keep up a friendship with friends in other houses. Some friends I had known from before Goring days and I had had with such friends warm and upbuilding friendship experience. The house system was a very powerful culture and claimed the pupil too strongly.
More on the house system to come...
Wednesday, 1 August 2007
Academia - all important?
In terms of the boys and the boys' view on life, academia was not all important. Probably, rugby was all important. However, non-conventional areas, such as design and computing were generally seen as for "squares"... but more on that later.
To the masters, teachers and superiors academic success was high priority - perhaps "all important". There was often heard the phrase - "He is a BRIGHT boy... this one is not a BRIGHT boy".
The result of this, certainly in my case, was that I never saw non academic subjects as proper subjects. To me Art, Design, Music, Computing, Theatre studies... etc were not 'real' subjects, not serious. They were hobbies. Latin, Maths, English, History, Physics, Chemistry, French etc. - these were 'real' subjects. There were two ways to get past this code (1) One's own indomitable enthusiasm, (2) A teacher / tutor's enthusiasm for the pupil. For me I tried terribly hard on the (1) basis to get into the theatre, and I was lured into Music studies becasue of (2). More on this later.
The importance of academic success meant that tehre was a lot of pressure at this level. Academic work was much greater in volume and harder in its matter than at my previous school.
It also meant that the boys were put into "streams" - A,B,C,D,E. A was for the 'brightest'. E was for the least 'bright'. I was in the A stream. Most of my contemporaries in my house were in B,C,D,E. Those in the E Stream were immediately called "thickies", "thick as pig shit" etc. by their contemporaries.
Being academically 'bright' (we had fortnightly grades to show how we were doing - in terms of ABCDE - in each subject) was very important to the staff. We were supposed to perform against our 'stream'. If a pupil underperformed he was given a report card... More on this later.
To the masters, teachers and superiors academic success was high priority - perhaps "all important". There was often heard the phrase - "He is a BRIGHT boy... this one is not a BRIGHT boy".
The result of this, certainly in my case, was that I never saw non academic subjects as proper subjects. To me Art, Design, Music, Computing, Theatre studies... etc were not 'real' subjects, not serious. They were hobbies. Latin, Maths, English, History, Physics, Chemistry, French etc. - these were 'real' subjects. There were two ways to get past this code (1) One's own indomitable enthusiasm, (2) A teacher / tutor's enthusiasm for the pupil. For me I tried terribly hard on the (1) basis to get into the theatre, and I was lured into Music studies becasue of (2). More on this later.
The importance of academic success meant that tehre was a lot of pressure at this level. Academic work was much greater in volume and harder in its matter than at my previous school.
It also meant that the boys were put into "streams" - A,B,C,D,E. A was for the 'brightest'. E was for the least 'bright'. I was in the A stream. Most of my contemporaries in my house were in B,C,D,E. Those in the E Stream were immediately called "thickies", "thick as pig shit" etc. by their contemporaries.
Being academically 'bright' (we had fortnightly grades to show how we were doing - in terms of ABCDE - in each subject) was very important to the staff. We were supposed to perform against our 'stream'. If a pupil underperformed he was given a report card... More on this later.
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